"i want it all...

i don't care what it takes."

i started "burning bright" for one purpose only: not for it to ever be read by anyone, but simply as a placeholder for the cathartic effects that i get from writing, and in this case, journaling. in the process of spewing out all those things i was feeling inside, i almost inadvertently found a new purpose for the blog as a home for reviews that i wrote about shows that could eventually (hopefully) serve as a springboard for me, straight into Rolling Stone. ok, i knew that was a bit of a stretch, but really i wanted it to be sort of an online portfolio that showcased what i was capable of. as school overtook my life this semester, though, i found that i just wasn't ready to dedicate the time to search out an outlet that would assign me to go to local shows and cover them. so "burning bright" faded only to glow, and a dim one at that. 

now, i find myself being drawn back to the blog for those same cathartic effects for which i was initially attracted to it. i don't have many readers, and let's be honest, most of those who do read my reviews don't care half as much about the music i am so passionate about as i do. so i believe it is time for a change of pace. i still want to review shows that i go to, and a huge part of me still yearns to do that in a professional capacity (even though "almost famous" scared the beejezus out of me. i just kept thinking to myself, "oh no-- i AM william!" but anyhoo...) i just need to write more frequently, and about more personal things. 

as i was thinking about this desire to blog more, i realized there was something new that i want to start writing about, journalistic standards of objectivity and conflict of interest be damned. my boyfriend is in a band (go ahead, say how lame that statement is. i know, i know. i even said it about myself as i wrote it). i frequently go to shows of said band, thus providing me reviewable show material. they also are at a point where any and all attention and p.r. would be wonderful.  plus, i am so passionate about them, and really think they are good and have a real chance of making it big (go ahead, scream "lame" one more time. it's cool, i'm used to it). them being a serious, professional, signed band would change my life dramatically as well, because basically, all of my dreams would be coming true.

so, my new vision: "burning bright" follows the struggles, the uphill battle, the pain, and the occasional rewards of a local band trying to make it. will i be able to follow this through without getting bored with it and moving on to a new focus? maybe. will it make me happy just to try until i do tire of it? you better believe it. plus, i have no chance of falling into the "almost famous" traps of getting close, then them pulling away and kicking me off the bus. for one, they don't even have a bus. two, all i have to do is threaten the life of my boyfriend, and it's all good. i am already so in love with all of them in their own way (but of course, only in love in the sense of "i wanna marry you and have your babies with one of them. i won't ruin the suspense by telling you which one) and i know that by reading about them and listening to their music, you just might fall in love too.