Girls, Girls, Girls. The show. Not the song. Well, maybe the song too.

If you are a 20-something girl and your life is in a complete and total state of disarray, you must watch Girls.  Don't question me. Get HBO. Or, get a friend with HBO Go who is nice enough to share his account (thanks again, yo).






Seriously, almost every line of this is me. Almost. Every. Line. I was going to write all them, but then I realized I was just going to transcribe the entire trailer and ain't nobody got time for that. So I just watched it ten more times instead. 

I don't know that I can wait until January 13. 

I had to. The power of Motley was just too much to resist.

There is nothing stronger two people can share than music.

In my opinion, at least. But in my experiences, it has proven true that there is not one single thing that can more quickly bring two people together and form a more powerful bond than a deep discussion about songs that mean something to you. 

 It doesn't matter where the conversation happens-- It can be in a truck, driving down a country back road at midnight, radio turned up, windows rolled down just enough to let the cigarette smoke sneak out and night air stream in. It can be sitting around a wooden kitchen table at six in the morning, iPod plugged in and speakers cranked up loud enough to fight off a sleepless delirium, mason jars drained of their offering of the opposite of your morning coffee. The location is secondary; what matters is the dialogue and the music fueling it.   


 Sister Hazel- This Kind of Love

  

Your company matters, too. A certain amount of trust must exist for the exchange to work. It is a vulnerable position to put yourself in- to share a song that you really care about, that means so much to you, one that you have enjoyed and want someone else to enjoy as well. There is an inner chatter that you have as the song is playing - What if they don't feel the same way about the song as you do? What if they don't like it? Or, maybe even worse, they just like it and don't have the same strong, deep, visceral reaction to it that you do. Did your good taste in music fail you? Or, does your taste just suck? Maybe it's the other person. Maybe their taste is terrible. If that's the case, then it's the end of the line for me. Unplug my iPhone or take out the cd and head back to the house. It's done with. If we can't share good music, we ain't sharing anything. Sorry yo. It's just the way it has to be.
 
Ryan Bingham-- The Weary Kind 

But sometimes, everything aligns. The right people, place and song all come together at the perfect moment. Something magical happens. Your mind awakens; you come alive in the deepest parts of your soul. As the music plays in the background, either you or your companion share your story of the song- Of the background behind it and how you came to love it. And even if it's not the typical kind of music you listen to, or anything you had ever even imagined that you could enjoy, you like it. More than that, you feel it. In your head, your heart, your soul- You really, truly feel it. For those few, brief moments nothing else exists in the world aside from the two of you and the music...And you are truly alive.       

Shooter Jennings-- Belle of the Ball

  

I cherish every time I am lucky enough to have one of these conversations, usually with one of my musician friends-who-are-boys (see how careful I am not to use the words "boy" and "friend" in any close proximity to each other? That is my life. Team Forever Alone- I'm making shirts, message me if you want to join the club. We have weekly meetings at the apartment watching Hallmark Christmas movies and crying into bowls of ice cream. Just kidding. Kinda).
   

Waylon Jennings-- Outlaw Shit 

But seriously, sharing music with others is one of the most important things in my life. I know it is so silly, but I feel I have more purpose and my existence has more meaning when people tell me they hear a song for the first time on one of my posts and it means something to them. It takes me back to the quote from The Perks of Being a Wallflower that I wrote about a while back. A song is an immensely powerful thing. Finding someone you can share something so powerful with is such a big deal. These people you can feel songs with, who you can listen and share and talk and grow with, these are the people in my life that have really changed me, that I have grown the most from knowing. If you've been one of those people in my life, I thank you. I hope, in some small way, that I can be that person for you.

tour blog, round 2

I went out again with Fifth on the Floor for a short little run last weekend and had an awesome time even though I was fairly certain that I was going to die from a terrible cold that just won't go away. Basically the entire band was sick, too, so we had a cacophony of nose blowing, sneezing and coughing as the soundtrack to our longggg van rides across Kentucky, West Virginia, Virginia, North Carolina, and Tennessee.

November 15
Roanoke, Virginia
Martin's Downtown

Literally the best tour bag ever. So many pockets! Thank you, Lisa!

"Virginia bound, if the plague doesn't kill me first "

I have become a professional at putting on my hoface in the back of the van. It's a talent, really.

Pretty mountains in West Virginia

Very large fake bear, right after we saw a real live bear crossing the interstate.

Just saw a sign that said "Speed limit enforced by aircraft" Virginia ain't messing around.

I'm back! And I even had a table cloth. Fancy y'all.

"It's hard to feel attractive with a Kleenex attached to your nose. Please buy shirts from me still. They're germ free."

‏

"Snowboarders from Virginia. I like that shit. Tell me your job is better than mine. Just try."

"Sharing drugs with the band. And by drugs I mean mucinex. Rock n' roll y'all."

Only the fanciest hotels will do for me, please.

November 16

Fayetteville, North Carolina

Black Cat Lounge

"If I make it through this tour without this cold killing me it'll be a miracle. I can only hear when I tilt my head to the right. Awesome."

Turns out I have a fear of free range pigs. I am a fan of having my own room on the road though, so it (known as Harley) was overlooked.

November 17 
Charlotte,  North Carolina
The Thirsty Beaver

I was super skeptical about this place. I looked at the Facebook page when I first learned we were going there, and my expectations were low. It looked like a tiny, sketchy hole in the wall. And when we got there, my predictions were correct. But even though it was tiny and sketchy it was AMAZING. It seems that these smaller venues are always the best- the people that go there are like a big family, and they are always so kind and willing to accept us as part of that family. 

Any establishment ballsy enough to paint a large beaver on the side gets a thumbs up from me.

Charlotte. Such a pretty city.

 "Highlight of every show night: when the band introduces me to the crowd. #bestjobever"

So many people!

Drunk boys. They're fun times for sure. 

Sometimes I sell from a chair. Sometimes I sell on a pool table, chatting with amazingly interesting old men, trying to decide if it's worth pursuing the position of 4th wife.

"I will marry an old man and be at least a second wife #writethatdown"

"

Church ladies are judging me at the Bojangles as I eat fries with my biscuits and gravy. It's ok. I'm judging myself.

Healthy, balanced brunch.

A demon dog ate my contacts. Awesome.

Cotton fields

Backseat. Windows up. That's the way...wait, no- wrong genre of music.

Mountains and  leaves everywhere

Gorgeous

My view from the back

I am one lucky girl to have the chance to travel around with a great band that is gaining such a following. Hearing live music every night at cool venues in different cities across the country is the best description of living the dream I could ever imagine. It's pretty timely that I say I've very thankful for this crazy life I'm living right now. If I live through this plague I can't wait to go out with the guys again.

  

bubblebath soundtrack.

Sometimes I need to write to know how I feel.  Only after I have typed or written words down in a tangible, coherent form am I able to process and really celebrate or cope. Other times I need to just listen and let the music feel for me and my mind can catch up later. Today is the latter.


Seether-- Breakdown

 

Chris Cornell-- Call Me a Dog

 

 

John Mayer-- Slow Dancing in a Burning Room 

Candlebox-- Cover Me

This is the best version of this song I could find on youtube, but if you have spotify, check out the Alive in Seattle version. It's amazing. 


update: At the brilliant recommendation of Andrew, the most perfect bubble bath song:

  I am ashamed to have overlooked such a gem.

"waiting for my last synapse to fry"

I'm still a transportationlesss caged bird in this apartment. Lucky for you, I decided to capture my mental breakdown in a sort of stream of consciousness ramble. One day when my literary genius is finally celebrated, they will look back on this post and say, "Yes, yes this is the point where she completely f'ing lost it." Enjoy.

•  The title of this post has absolutely nothing to do with what this is actually about, but it is stuck--no completely engrained-- in my head and I can't get it out. It's Hellbound Glory, and it's not even on an album or anything, but I recorded it on my phone one night when they were playing and I am so glad I did because I have probably listened to it a hundred times since. I wish I could share it with ya, but Leroy asked me not to yet, so just know as soon as I can I will, and the words "Cocaine, Kurt Cobain" will be just as stuck in your head too.

•  "Nutshell" is the greatest song in the history of ever, especially the Unplugged version. If you disagree, then I hate you and your shit taste in music. 
• If I had monies, I would get a new tattoo. Just fyi. It would be a feather, and I would really like to incorporate the words "if i can't be my own," which is part of a line from "Nutshell." Would that be weird to have just part of the line, like an unfinished sentence? I know it would be a little weird, but I kind of like it that way.  
• I'm just kidding about hating you if you don't like "Nutshell." I just pity you instead.
• One might easily be lead to believe that the altered state of my mind that is writing this post is drunk, but it's actually just really, really hungry. The two are easily confused.  
• Speaking of hungry, this new found "broke as a very unfunny joke" state of my life makes me really regret dates I have turned down due to my fear of commitment. Dinner and human contact would be heavenly right about now. Ah, hindsight...and steak. I haven't eaten meat all week other than eggs. Need. Steak. And diet coke. I may actually need that more than I need steak.
• I had a fear this morning that I was going to be one of those people that die alone in their apartments and aren't found for days. Bright side of this happening to me: I don't have a cat right now that would eat me, so that's nice. 
• If you are still reading this, I'm questioning your sanity as much as I'm questioning mine. Which is no question. Y'all this is madness, go read a book or talk to other humans instead. Or eat steak and think of me!
• That Victoria knows what she's doing. I'm not really sure why I haven't worn this new bra more.
•  This morning in an attempt to emerge from the darkness of this apartment, I ran. A lot. I went all Forrest Gump and just kept running. This was a terrible idea, as I am old and so out of shape. My legs hurt real bad, like I really need to pee but the thought of hobbling to the bathroom is too painful, so I'm just holding it and drinking more water instead. But I feel skinnier than I did before I ran (and then didn't eat all day.) Someone come see how skinny I look! I'm just kidding, I don't actually look any skinnier. But it was a nice thought. Wouldn't it be awesome if it worked that way? Like you could just run a lot and instantly look skinnier?
  
  
• Is the fact that I can relate anything in life to Honey Boo Boo sad? Don't answer that.
• And I wonder how I am still single.....

Ramble On: November 8

 My best posts usually come when I'm right on the verge of big thesis progress and I want nothing more than to pretend hablo espanol and don't even know what the word thesis means. I'm in that kind of mood today. It doesn't help at all that I'm coming out of a new-music drought that I've been in for a while as so many new albums are either dropping or streaming this week. Plus, as if I needed one more factor to contribute to my complete and total lack of focus, I am in Lexington with no car and no job. What this should mean: I have limitless time to write. What this actually means: I am absolutely losing my ever-loving mind, evident most by the fact that I am at this moment eating cheese and crackers and drinking a Mountain Dew. (If you know me at all, you know this clearly indicates I've fallen apart more than just a little bit. It's not even a diet Dew. It's that bad.) I am a bird that is not meant to be caged and I am losing it.

So while I was trying to make the minutes pass more quickly today by playing stay at home roommate and swiffering the floor and washing the dishes after I ran a few miles (I call this my trophy wife training program) I had new music playing. And here is what I discovered to share with you:

Soundgarden-- King Animal 

Official release date: Nov. 13, streaming now on iTunes: http://bit.ly/KingAnimaliTunes

It's hard for me to really tell how I feel about an album by just streaming it on iTunes, and my expectations were high because it's freakin' Soundgarden and I want need a new "Black Hole Sun" or "Outshined" or "Spoonman." The entire album is good, but I had to wait until the very last track to find a song that reallllyyyyy impressed me. "Rowing" gives me chills every single time I listen to it. Next Tuesday, King Animal will be mine, if for nothing other than "Rowing."

Stone Sour-- House of Gold and Bones, Part 1


My expectations for this album were medial. I like the majority of the Stone Sour songs that I've heard, but they have never really been a band that I've put effort into hearing past what was on the radio. I saw them at Rupp a while back with Avenged Sevenfold and loved their live show (which didn't surprise me because it's mother f'ing Corey Taylor, what do you expect?!). Last week they had their cd release show for House of Gold and Bones, Part 1 in their hometown of Des Moines literally right across the street from where I was with Fifth on the Floor and I was curios to listen to what so many people seemed to be going crazy about. 

I would go so far as to say that this is one of my favorite new albums of 2012. It is heavy as hell, but balanced with enough of actual singing from Taylor (the reason I am a fan of Stone Sour but not Slipknot). It is serious good music. My top three picks from the album: 

Stone Sour-- "Rumor of Skin"

Stone Sour--"Tired"

Stone Sour--"Taciturn"

This is my favorite song from the album, and this acoustic version makes me like it even more.

 
Deftones-- Koi No Yokan

The Deftones are also streaming their new album Koi No Yokan on Revolver's website. It's available Nov. 13, but my suggestions for you to stream: "Entombed." And here's the lyric video already out for "Tempest."

Deftones-- "Tempest"

 
.......And a few other suggested songs, that either I have been into lately or that my "the state of rock music today is so sad" wannabe-hipster friend suggested. Enjoy!

The Airborne Toxic Event-- "Sometime Around Midnight" 

I feel like this song would be perfect in the soundtrack for my life at some epic moment. 

Dawes-- "If I Wanted Someone" 

This has been stuck in my head for a couple of weeks now. I thought it was an older song until I looked it up and saw that it was actually Dawes and just came out last year. The 'when' isn't what matters at all, though- all that I care about is how damn good it is. 

Civil Wars-- "Barton Hollow"

And finally this one, because even though they canceled the remaining dates of their current tour, I hope hope hope they stay together to make more music like this. 
     

tour blog: days 9,10

Day 9: November 3

Tootle’s Pumpkin Inn

Circleville, Ohio

I like to call this look "back of the van sexy." Aka I have completely given up and become an embarrassment to the band.-  1:02 PM - 3 Nov 12

And then he gave me woodford and diet, and i knew we had become best friends. - 12:14 AM - 4 Nov 12

    My favorite stop on the tour by a long shot. This place is great — at Tootle's.

I took no pictures of either band that night, not a single one of my merch table, nothing. I think that means I was too busy having fun. And selling lotsssss of merch $$$

Day 10: November 4 
South Gate House
Newport, Kentucky

Is there an award for hat thievery? Because I would like to be nominated and crowned winner.--
12:33 PM - 4 Nov 12

Mexican restaurant menu in Newport. Please note number 18 and let me know if I should have been frightened.

Merch from the last night of my first tour

Hellbound Glory

If you haven't heard of Hell Bound Glory you must check them out. Great music and really nice guys. I've watched them play every night for the last week and I'm still not tired of their songs. — at The Southgate House Revival.

I'm a sad merch girl tonight knowing I gotta go back to lex and the real world. Thanks Fifth on the Floor for some of the most fun times of my life. Lets do it again soon- how's next week sound?- Monday near Newport, KY



And this is where I am supposed to sum it all up, but I just don't even know how. All week long people have been asking me to tell them about it, and I can't even begin to. When you build things up so much in your mind, it's hard for them to live up to the expectations you have in your head. Strangely, this did. It shouldn't. This is not the lifestyle that a normal 24yr-old girl with an almost Masters, two Bachelors, and a "bright future" should love. This is not what I should dream about and want more than anything. But herein lies the problem: I am not normal. Surprise! Ha, yeah right. I've known for a very long time that the normal life of sitting in an office everyday, going home to the same home, seeing the same people EVERY SINGLE DAY was not the life for me. At least not now. I have a strong case of the gypsys, and an even stronger case of the wanderlust. I love music more than food and water, and I'd give up my iPhone to see live music every night. This is what I want to do for a while now. 

I'm not sure if any of them will read this, but I want to thank Fifth on the Floor from the bottom of my itty bitty heart for letting me experience this with them. I worked my little butt off and I hope it showed. If you decide to take me out again, I promise I'll try not to talk or eat so much ;) Love y'all!   

Til next time.