Enough with the Grandma Boobies. Enough.

Friday, September 6
Southgate House Revival
Newport, Kentucky

Downgrade from a bus to a Sprinter. At least I had plenty of room for activities.

Candy was here. Or there. However you phrase it.

Love the Southgate House.

 Talking to drunk people is a lot like talking to infants...#merchgirlprobs

Pizza, delivered to the merch table. A-freakin-Men.

 I love Southgate House. I love Fifth on the Floor. I love Shooter Jennings and the GFY'S. But more than that I love doing shows in Kentucky and supporting Kentucky made beverages.

I love Justin Wells. Even when he puts his finger up my nose.

Bless it's sweet little drunk heart.

We take the best purposefully bad pictures. 

WAFFLEHOUSE. COUNTRY STYLE. YESSSSSSSSSS.

I love gas station bathrooms with fake flora. 

Saturday, September 7
Chick Ridge Bike Rally 
Hardinsburg, Kentucky

Officially the most redneck event I've ever attended, and I'm from Tompkinsville — at Chick Ridge Biker Rally.

Every time I look up from my merch table, the first thing i see is a woman in a bikini. A big old fat woman in a bikini. #killmenow

At this point, I quit taking pictures because all I saw was terrible, terrible sin. It was the closest I have ever came to quitting my job and walking home. Plus I had to pee and wanted to puke and missed boy way big bad. Life was far from good. So I tweeted.

When I look the other direction, I see a man on stage who's full frontal junk i just saw peeing by the trailer. #seriouslykillmenow

45+ dance contest. Grandma boobies. Horrible grandma boobies dragging the ground. I. Want. To. Die.

Your name is Christmas?!
  
 

found a biker husband. He gave me moonshine. His name is Torch. We're in love #needtoborrowthosechaps